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BoundaryLabA safe place to put it down
People write here about things that were hard to say out loud. That only works if this stays a place where it’s safe to. Here is what we do to keep it that way, and what we’re asking of you.
What we do
Four things we promise.
You choose the name you go by
Your first name, or something you make up — both are fine, and you can change it later. Whatever you pick is the only name on your story: we take out workplaces, job titles, and anything else that could identify you or the people in it.
Every story is checked before it goes up
Nothing publishes automatically. The team reviews each one for anything unsafe — details that could identify someone, or anything that puts you or another reader at risk — and comes back to you if something needs a second look.
Your consent, and you can change it
Nothing is shared beyond what you agreed to. Ask us to edit or take your story down at any time, for any reason, and we will — without asking why.
Replies are off unless you turn them on
No story can be replied to by default. When you share one, you choose whether to open it — and you can close it again later, which takes any replies with it.
What we ask
We keep it safe together.
Most of what makes a place feel safe isn’t policy — it’s how the people already there behave. Four things we ask of anyone reading or writing here.
Read like it's someone you know
Every story here was written by a person who found it hard to say. Read it the way you would want yours read.
Keep other people's details out
Don't name workplaces, colleagues, or anyone who hasn't chosen to be here — in your own story or anywhere else on the site.
Nobody owes anyone advice
A story isn't a request to be fixed. If someone has opened theirs to replies, that's an invitation to be heard — not to be told what they should have done.
Your experience is yours to describe
There's no bar to clear for something to count. If it sat wrong with you, it's worth writing down.
What isn’t okay here
The short list.
- Naming or identifying someone who hasn't consented to be named.
- Telling someone their experience wasn't serious enough to matter.
- Using a story to argue a point about a group of people.
- Replying to argue, diagnose, or tell someone what they should have done.
- Anything that would make this unsafe for the person who wrote it.
If something here crosses one of those lines, tell us and we’ll take it down while we look at it. We would rather remove something too quickly than leave it up while someone waits.
If somebody won’t
Almost never, and here’s what happens when it is.
Nearly everything gets sorted with a note and a small edit. When it doesn’t — when an account is being used to name people, to go after somebody, or to turn a story against the person who wrote it — we can put that account on hold. It stops being able to publish or reply, and its folder comes out of the archive.
On hold, not deleted. Nothing they wrote is destroyed, they keep every word of it, and if we have made a mistake we undo it. We tell them it happened and give them the reason in plain words, because being removed without being told why is its own kind of harm. Deleting an account outright is kept for the rare case where leaving it in place would put somebody at risk.
This is written out in full in the terms, and everybody with an account is shown it and asked before they write anything.
You can change your mind
Consent given once isn’t consent forever. If you’ve shared something and want it edited, anonymised further, closed to replies, or removed entirely, write to us and it’s done. You don’t need a reason, and we won’t ask for one.
[email protected]BoundaryLab isn’t a crisis service and we can’t offer legal or clinical advice. If you’re in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services.