At the dinner table — by Anonymous

Is it normal for a friend to ask your body count at a dinner table?

So… this is about a convo I had with a friend, and I still don’t know if I’m overreacting or not. We’ve known each other for a little over 2 years. Met at an event, he’s kinda new to my current friend group. We hang out pretty often, sometimes at a house party, sometimes at a bar. One night, we’re all drinking, having one of those “deep” conversations. Out of nowhere, this friend goes, “I don’t feel that close to you yet… you don’t really share personal stuff with me. You just talk to me superficially.” (For context, he’s gay, so no sexual interest there whatsoever.) So I’m like, “Okay… what do you want to know then?” He paused for a sec, and then said… “What’s your body count then?” Y'all...he asked this. In front of TEN people. At the dinner table. He's got fashion sense but absolutely no common sense. I literally froze, frowned at him, then turned to another friend, who immediately went, “That’s not a question you should ask someone!” But then another friend was like, “Oh that’s normal,” and started sharing his body count like it was a fun icebreaker. (since when this is normal? 🥲) I just… didn’t answer. Moved on. But deep down, I was so annoyed. I’ve actually called him out once before, telling him to chill and stop being so nosy. But he doesn’t seem to get it. For extra context: we’ve talked about his trauma before. Back in school, his friends talked behind his back, excluded him, and completely cut him out. He was alone for a while until he found a new friend group. Now, he’s terrified of being left out of anything. That includes if people are keeping secrets or not telling him stuff. The question is I'm I being too harsh here, or was that question really as out of line as I felt in the moment? And is there a way to respond to it when people ask about your body count (even it's your friend) Thanks — First posted on the BoundaryLab forum by Anonymous, 8 August 2025. Kept here with the name they chose.